The Effective Complaint

by Jackie Bauer

Complain! Complain! Complain! It’s a habit we can all get into if we’re not careful. As parents we can easily fall into that trap ourselves if we forget the most important element in a parent-teacher relationship, namely, communication. The key to effectively issuing a complaint is to have established a line of communication with the teacher. If the only time we talk to a teacher is when we’re not satisfied, the relationship will undoubtedly be strained.

Parents are naturally protective of their children and should have an active role in their children’s education. But part of being an effective parent is to practice Christian discernment. When our children come home with the latest stories from the classroom, there is wisdom in not jumping to an immediate conclusion If you have a question or concern, calm down, and then call the teacher. Do this sooner, rather than later. It can alleviate a lot of ill feelings and provide a format for discussion.

Speaking the truth in love is the best approach to issuing a complaint. Remember, the purpose of sharing your dissatisfaction is to bring about change or arrive at a better understanding of the situation or person. Pointing an accusing finger at someone in frustration or anger only causes hurt feelings.

Here are a few tips to help your response remain God-pleasing:

  • Communicate regularly with the teacher.
  • Listen to your child with discernment.
  • Ask for clarification.
  • Think through the situation.
  • Pray about the matter.
  • Speak the truth in love.
  • Model Christ’s patience and love.

There will always be situations that don’t seem right or fair. Christian parents who think the problem through and pray about it before approaching the teacher model a very important lesson for their children.

From Lutheran Parent May-June 1998 © 1998 Northwestern Publishing House. All rights reserved.


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